Let me start off by saying right off the bat that Terminal 5 is the worst venue in the city. Maybe even in the greater Northeast (along with strong contender Tune Inn, in New Haven, CT*). Here is an approximated re-eactment of the IM conversation with el Herno the day these moe. dates were announced:
lg: OOOOOOOH!!!!! awesome!
lg: as long as it's not at terminal 5.
eh: it's at terminal 5.
lg: NO NO NO!!!!!!
eh: it can't be that bad.
lg: DAMN YOU DERHAK!!!!!!!!!!!! DAAAAMNNN YOUUUUUUU!!!!!
My repulsion of Terminal 5 stems from a Ween show in '07. Since that experience I have actually not seen some acts as they roll through town simply because I hate that venue- that includes the Beastie Boys, Cake, & Les Claypool. I am getting angry just thinking about the place right now.
Anyways, those fucking assholes decided to play 2 shows at Terminal 5 and I considered going to Denver to see the Fillmore shows instead. But I bought the damn tickets, cuz it's moe. and how can I miss an nyc show? So, moe.'s return from hiatus for me was bittersweet: excited to see them for the first time since moe.down, but had to deal with Terminal 5 to do it. I went between giddiness and disgust for months and had severe bouts of nausea as the dates approached. The only plus to Terminal 5's location in the middle of nowhere (or as Lisa described it, "this is where people disappear from"), is it's proximity to Fusion, a chill little bar that serves fresh cocktails and has a back patio- making pregame moe.jitos totally possible. So fuck yeah on that.
I met up with the running crew [el Herno, Lisa, Melissa, her friend Dave (Dan?), and Craig (his first moe. show! He was rightly scared as we had told him that moe. were going to gang rape him.).] and quickly downed 2 moe.jitos. Really quickly. Way too quickly. We sang "Do the Hustle" and headed on over to the venue. Craig saw two undercovers busting two hippies across the street and we got on line. The security people have gotten much nicer since the nazi search and seizure days of the Ween show when I had an Advil confiscated, but they are definitely still there to drive the cattle through the front doors. Let's talk a little bit about logistics here for a second- when setting up a bar or a venue, what would be a convenient location for a coat-check? Up a narrow staircase on the 2nd floor on the other side of the bar and bathrooms? Yes, that makes perfect sense. Okay! They did add a few flat panel screens that hang above the railing which I suppose helps if you want to watch the band you went to see live on a tv screen. Also, I would imagine they block some of the taller patrons' views.
We ran right into Pete and his wife Sara who had scored some rail space which was totally sweet, but those fucking "cutout" tables they have against the rails are just a tease. Like, "you're here, you're at the rail, but you still can't see, you must just love sucking my cock." It was nice to see the boys, but the show started out pretty slowly. They got NYC out of the way immediately, All Roads Lead to Home, Moth... Let's get right to this SOMP -> Spine transition- it didn't work so much. They should seriously consider not doing that again. Sometime around now is when the two kids next to us turned and said, "are you on anything because the lights are doing something really weird right now." "I'm high on Rob Derhak", was my response. During setbreak we ran into Matt Campbell but he had to jet to go defend their rail space so we would try and meet up Saturday night.
The second set is when the evil started coming out, they needed it now more than ever. Gullo also found us but not after standing on the floor and taking some awesome pics. It was a pretty solid set with some of the heavier tunes like McBain, SOMP, Timmy- but a really nice surprise was Widespread Panic's, "Space Wrangler" which everyone seemed to enjoy. Vinnie was fucking slamming and Al was going pretty nuts too- though we couldn't see him unless we leaned over the railing. The Meat encore was fantastic. It was amateur hour upstairs with the crowd though, there were some real assholes that kind of invaded our area and they were pretty rude taboot. The general consensus seemed to be set 1: mediocre at best / set 2: getting there. We hoped the momentum would carry through to the 2nd night. And we were headed down to the floor in an attempt to get a better view. On the walk out of the venue there were- no joke- 3 or 4 tanks set up along 56th street. Are you fucking kidding me? Craig survived, we're not sure if he liked it though.
crowd pic by gullo, click here for his gallery... I'm on the upper left balcony about 4 people in, green shirt.
Right after the show we headed down to the Ace of Clubs to see Lynch play their cd-release party. These guys are totes solid and I picked up the new album. They were rockin' out and everyone in the crowd was lit the fuck up- wow. We're talking dangerous territory about an hour in. It was around then I decided I needed food badly enough to leave... and also when the bathroom was being used primarily for coke rather than peeing. "TAKE YOUR DIRTY HABIT INTO PUBLIC" I announced, "I NEED TO FUCKING PEE!!!"
lynch at the Ace of Clubs
Started off similarly at Fusion, where we were joined by Stacey, and due to our determination to stake out territory on the floor, time constraints would limit me to 1 moe.jito before we trekked over to the venue. We scored some land near the stage, al.side and sent Hern upstairs with our coats. We would bust heads to stay close if we had to. Lisa had barely seen al. the night before and she was in a vicious fucking mood. Also, we had Pete the Enforcer with us and worked out a hand-signal to flash if we needed help- the 'batoosey'. We made friends with the people around us and formed alliances to help keep our ground safe for short people. We never found Matt and his crew.
Pete the Enforcer
They definitely carried the momentum of the night before's set 2 & encore. It was pretty awesome. There were some dicks in the crowd but for the most part everyone was cool and more importantly Lisa was able to watch the vein in al.'s head pulsate every time he got really going- which was a lot, cuz he was on FIYE-YAH for both these shows! I may have liked Blue Jeans Pizza, but I'm still not completely sure. Waiting for the Punchline was especially appropriate as we were mere blocks from Sony's old offices and they kicked it's ass upside down and backwards!
A very strange thing happened during Happy Hour Hero, which was I was grabbed on both upper arms by a tweaked out gobi carrying a fly swatter trying to push past me, to which I said, "get your fucking hands off me." "chill, babe" was his reply. "No, seriously dude. Get your fucking hands off me right now." but he wouldn't let go, so I quickly made a judgement call which was "is this guy tweaked out enough to hit a girl? and how many of the boys standing here will hold him back if he tries to?". I was indeed in a hell-raising mood when I walked through those front doors that night... I gave him a shove backwards. Which was exactly about when he flipped his lid, got quite animated, and started calling me a bitch, etc. As he got in my face both Lisa and I frantically started flashing the "batoosey" sign in the air trying to catch Pete the Enforcer's eyes, but it was NO USE! There were just too many people separating us at that point. So I'm standing there as this guy is screaming at me and I realize a giant circle has cleared around us, he's jumpy & tweaked and I'm staring & laughing a little wondering why I had to fuck with him but at least it was an entertaining story-- and this gobi is IN THE RED (never turn your back on a wook gone rabid)- luckily & happily, some dudes that we were standing near grabbed the guy (who says chivalry is dead? thanks, boys.) before he was escorted out by security who would pounce upon him like SPIDER MONKEYS... And Lisa and I are just standing there, staring at each other before we bust out laughing hysterically, as did al. who enjoyed the entire scene taking place at his feet.
Now, in honor of this very special episode of a moe. show with lynn, lynnguppy.blogspot.com is proud to present this...
KNOW YOUR WOOK
There are certain things all wooks have in common but sizing up identifying factors in the confronting wook can be essential to your survival. Their eyes are always tweaked and their stench might be identifying but try your best to ignore it- you must go beyond these basics to assess the situation-at-hand. These four steps may one day save your life:
- Hair: is it trim? dreads? recently washed? Lack of hygiene can indicate a death wish and financial situation. Is there product in that hair?
- Weapon: a balloon? a glowstick? a broken bottle of jack daniels? Wicker basket (can indicate goo-ball supplies)? If Hunter S. Thompson has taught me anything it's that a flyswatter might indicate Mescaline.
- Missing Clothes: No shirt? No pants? No Shoes? Sometimes lack of clothes will make them more aerodynamic and/or infectious, take this into consideration before altercation.
- Glisten: Have they recently showered? (probably not) Does their skin have more of a glossy or matte finish? Are there stickers (this could also indicate goo-ball supplies)? Homeless or just on tour? (good indication of fragility/state of mind)
So, remember kiddies- those 4 factors: H.W.M.G. or Just remember this easy phrase: Horrible Wooks & Mega Gobis... It could save your life!
... this has been a Public Service Announcement brought to you by lynnguppy.blogspot.com
... the more you know!
She Sends Me & Yodelittle were awesome. I really enjoyed Faker--- I heart Faker- though, Rob really might consider learning the lyrics already. Is this when the disco ball came on or was that Kids? Whichever one that was- it was an odd and awkward moment for the giant disco ball. I got a larf out of that. For the encore al. sang After Hours (a Velvet Underground song) solo which I have to admit I don't remember... and Mexico, which I do remember, because it was fabulous. Mexico always gives me such an uplifting feeling and I've got good memories associated with it, so it made me smile. Actually, I don't think I stopped smiling most of the night- including the gobi-attack. Man I'm glad he wasn't a chimp. He totally could have been. That would have been bad but I probably wouldn't have fucked with a chimp. You just don't fuck with a chimp.
look at those vicious feet!
After the show we went to use the bathrooms upstairs which was around the time some douchebag started smoking a cigarette and blowing the smoke directly into the fire alarm. Oddly enough, we had been talking about what a death trap Terminal 5 is and that there aren't enough exits- AT ALL. Like, in a really really bad way- the place is dangerous. We hoped with all our hearts that it wasn't a real fire and peed anyway. Of course when we went to find Hern he was gone, he had trampled about 30 people on his push out the door when the alarm went off. I found $10 on the stairs, gave $5 to the guy directly in back of me and then went and put it towards a poster. As we walked towards 11th ave the FDNY showed up. Not bad but I think they could do a lot better. Oh, and also, the tourscum element on the sidewalks was really just lame. Those people should go achieve bisco elsewhere.
moe. 2/13 & 2/14,Terminal 5, NYC. There are a lot of factors in this one and actually the fair way to do this would be to do band and venue separately, but T5 is just gonna get a 2 huzzahs... instead of a 0, only cuz I didn't get my ass beat down by some rabid fucking wook douchebag. The place reminds me of a County Correctional Facility. The band- 8.75 HUZZAHS- cuz the 2nd night was super fucking strong and it was great to see them chillaxed.
* "It's like watching a show inside a gigantic metal turd." - ??? Who said this? Marty?
SETLISTS & LINKIES!
Kick Out The Jams ^
New York City
All Roads Lead To Home
Deep This Time ->
Seat Of My Pants ->
Spine Of A Dog * ->
Looney Tunes theme
Seat Of My Pants (reprise)
Space Wrangler -> ^
Timmy Tucker ->
* = inverted (end jam at beginning, vocal jam at end)
^ = 1st time played
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Sticks & Stones ->
Blue Jeans Pizza
Spaz Medicine ->
Waiting For The Punchline
Happy Hour Hero ->
She Sends Me
Wind it Up
The Faker ->
After Hours *
* = Velvet Underground song (Al solo)
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