soulive, 8/13/06, rocks off boat cruise, hudson river, new york city

okay, let me just start off right now with a disclaimer: i don't think i'm too good on boats. i've really only spent an extended period of time on a boat a couple of times. 1 being a seapods booze cruise on lake champlain in '99 in which i was medicated by a special brownie that kicked my ass and can't really remember much of the afternoon... except chopping off d-mighty's arm with a light saber. and at 2am in the monopole asking people around me if they still felt like they were on the boat... "everything keeps going up and down..." and the 2nd being my fake-brother's wedding rehearsal dinner, in which i accidentally ate an "edible" flower that was in my salad (motherfuckers), turned green, and had to take a benedryl and be escorted back to the hotel... missing a no doubt incredible evening at the 3 needs and filling myself up with crack-beer like the good ol' days. it is this fear of boats that has kept me off of things like jamcruise or moe.cruise... but i digress.

soulive, 8/13/06, rocks off boat cruise, hudson river, new york city

perhaps this boat ride would be different. or not.

we grabbed some grub and although i didn't intend to drink at all, i am just a fool for the cowgirl's margaritas. i mean they serve them in a mason jar for fuck's sake. UNCLE. we headed up to the dock and in full out preparation, i needed a medicating puff. strictly medicinal (see above disclaimer). and lemme tellya, it might have been the only thing that kept my shit together. we finally left shore and started heading towards the statue of liberty as the sun set. it was really pretty... but the boat was pretty claustrophobic. ugh. and again, i wasn't gonna drink, but at this point it was necessary. i was already second guessing my total committment to seeing this gig.

the band finally started up and they sounded okay. they were set up downstairs underneath the overhang of the 2nd floor. which actually blew cuz i couldn't even stare at alan banging away. they should really either move the band out into the open 5 feet or so, or just destroy the balcony that hangs above the "stage" area. also, the acoustics were pretty shitty. it reminded me of the tune inn in new haven. exactly like being trapped in a gigantic metallic turd.

they had advertised some "special guests" which i was hoping would consist of people like dj logic or vernon reid or maybe even a sax player... nope. it was a couple of "guest vocalists" who ended up more or less just screaming into the mic. loudly. i've seen this band kick some SERIOUS ass before, and i was expecting no less- i mean, we're cruising around manhattan, you'd think they would be on their game... not so much. the jams were kind of generic, loose, nothing special. at this point i'm feeling pretty old... we hung out a bit on the back of the boat, enjoyed the view of the city... the best city in the world. new york city. this was probably the best part of the show.

also, here, let me say that i've never wanted to leave a soulive show early... ever. and now that i finally wanted to leave a soulive show early- i was trapped on a fucking boat... it kinda sucked. well, we finally made it back to dock, the band had stopped, and i couldn't wait to jump onto solid ground... but we had to wait about a half hour for some reason, because they weren't letting anyone off the boat... so it was a lot of people, crammed into each other... trying to leave... it's hot... everyone is rocking back and forth... oh god, just thinking about it right now is making me nauseas and i've been off the boat for a good 2 1/2 weeks already. DAAAAMN did land feel good under my feet. i can't even begin to tell you...

anyways. a lame soulive show, trapped on a crowded boat... do i blame the band or the rocks off boat cruise? maybe i just don't drink enough to enjoy this sort of shit? i want to give this review more, but i'm teetering on the brink... this hurts me more than it hurts you, soulive... please forgive me alan... soulive rocks off cruise 8/13/06: 4 painful HUZZAHS. and that's being generous.

i told you, i don't think i'm so good on boats...