Monday, November 3, 2008

my beef with barack.

Barack Obama has my full support and can count on my vote Tuesday, but it is not without some beef. Back in September I wanted to make a donation to the campaign- my very first financial contribution to any political campaign*. On 9/14/08, I donated the best way I knew how- I bought a t-shirt. As a t-shirt aficionado, I knew the right one the second I saw it on the official Barack Obama Store** site. A classic charcoal grey with the sun-rising (like the dawn of a new day) O for "Obama" logo- twist my arm a little more, President B. Rock.

Since it was a great shirt and I was contributing to the evolution of mankind, I didn't mind spending $25 on the t and $8 or more on shipping fees. What I did mind was that 2 weeks after I ordered it, I still hadn't gotten it. Customer support's voicemail was full and the receptionist was forced to take hand written messages and try to sort them out. 2 weeks later I received an email from them saying my shirt was on back order and would ship as soon as it was back in stock. The next day it came in the mail. Except that it was the wrong size. So I called back and left another hand written message. Eventually I got a call, they would mail me a return postage label, then I could send the wrong shirt back, etc. Anyways, it's erev election day (if you will) and I never got my fucking shirt.

Barack... Dude. Who the hell is running your store? Talk about bureaucracy, I hope this isn't some small example of things to come- because I need affordable health care. Sitting in an office and putting t shirts in a box isn't fucking rocket science. You could have hired a floor full of stoners to do it out of their dorm rooms and they would have pulled it off- you gotta pass the post office on your way to the 7-11, man.

But there are other ways I could show my support. Take for example this go-getter at a Jay-Z/Diddy attended Obama Rally on Monday in Miami.
One attendee, 36-year-old Rebecca Vaughns, said Election Day would be especially sweet for her. The Miami resident, who was wearing a black Obama T-shirt and had a likeness of the nominee shaved in the back of her head, said she had been saving a giant chocolate "O" in her freezer for months, waiting for Nov. 4.
I just wanted a t-shirt.... so, perhaps tomorrow I will make my own t shirt out of green glitter puff paint and get a blue donkey tattooed on my left ass-cheek or drink margaritas and end up wandering off to an election night comedy show. You see that? I can't get too mad at the guy, the workers in his store may be retarded, but Barack Obama supports the Arts.

* While Greenpeace is not a "political campaign" I once gave them $1 for a cool sticker at a Phish show and got a lifetime of mail that was hopefully printed on 100% post-consumer content- but definitely burned fuel in transit.
** there's already a clearance sale! jews, jump on this!

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